Shut up!

Pulp Fiction is one of my very favorite movies of all time.  As a matter of fact, I might pop it in while I'm cleaning this afternoon.  For those of you with a delicate disposition that are easily offended, shield your precious little virgin eyes as I'm about to quote some filthy language.  (I now find myself wondering why you're reading my stuff in the first place if you're easily offended...anyways...)

Mia:  Don't you hate that?
Vincent:  What?
Mia:  Uncomfortable silences.  Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?
Vincent:  I don't know.  That's a good question.
Mia:  That's when you know you've found somebody special.  When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.

Mia makes a very valid point here.  Vincent is obviously horribly tortured by having to take the lovely Mia Wallace out to dinner.  I mean, she is the boss's wife after all.  Ever notice how chatty you get when you're nervous?  There are you weirdos out there that get all quiet when you're nervous, and that makes people like me nervous.  It's a vicious cycle.  Even Depeche Mode told us to "Enjoy the silence" in 1990.  And again in 2004.  Could there be something to all of this quiet??  And we've all heard "You have one mouth and two ears for a very good reason!"  That's poetic speak for "SHUT UP and listen!!"  Being the sort that observes and calculates, I can vouch for this quiet nonsense.  The girls I work with swear I have dog ears - I hear everything that happens in that store.  It's not that I have super human hearing, mind you.  It's that I'm much busier hearing than talking.  I've even learned to hear multiple conversations at one time - and fully retain knowledge of all of them.  


Being quiet and hearing everything is almost like a super power.  I always did think Wonder Woman was pretty bad ass...but that could be my affection for really big hair showing through.  I can't deflect bullets with big bracelets.  I love all things shiny, but they bring me little power.  Forgive me, I digress.  Sharing a comfortable silence with someone is a truly golden experience.  Have you ever accomplished this?  Turn of the TV, the iPod, the cell phones, and - if you're still of that persuasion - the land line phone.  Share the room with someone.  Can you make it five whole minutes without blathering on about some insignificant nonsense?  I know there is someone that will argue that I talk an awful lot.  And sometimes I do!  I mean, you should be inside my head for a day!  It's a damned busy place in there!  I have lots to get out so my cranium stays intact.  And I don't go completely bat shit nuts.  I'm not saying you should sit and gaze into each others' eyes and not speak.  That's not comfortable for anyone.  Just share a room.  Be quiet.  If all else fails, you can always take Mary Chapin Carpenter's advice and "Shut Up and Kiss Me!"  

Long story short, it's amazing what you can learn when you just relax and observe.  Once words escape your mouth, it's some sort of hell getting them back to where they came from.  They always leave a mess much akin to a red wine stain on a white counter top.  I'm pretty sure that happiness is a very quiet thing.  It's not a grand parade, bustling through the streets drawing attention to itself.  When you're quiet, you learn that someone likes chicken Masala, not chicken Marsala.  One letter could ruin a dinner!  If you're listening instead of hearing, you learn that there are days that make a heart sink by merely showing up on the calendar.  Sometimes listening helps you remember when somebody needs and extra hug or a few more minutes of quiet snuggling.  There are a thousand reasons to listen, and about a hundred reasons to speak.  If you're at a loss for words in an uncomfortable situation, good!  You don't have to say a word.  Just be there if you're needed.  Words tend to muck up already awkward situations.

All of this preaching about silence and quiet and listening and look at me rambling on!  I have laundry to do and Sissy fur to vacuum off the carpet - again!  AND I have meatballs to make for tonight's dinner!  Busy mind, busy hands I suppose.  Go give someone an unexpected hug.  It may be the saving grace of the hug-ee's day!  You never know what someone is going through.  I hope you all have a wonderful, quiet day.    

Shhhhh!!
Sunny