With every crazy thing that's going on in the world, I want to share a conversation that has stuck with me with you. I was greatly inspired and touched, and I hope that I can properly relay to you what I'm feeling!
A couple of days before this last Christmas, one of my students who is Hindu was getting ready to leave and hugged me and wished me a merry Christmas. I smiled and returned the greeting...then I asked if she celebrated Christmas. Her response resonated with my heart and is still reverberating in there as I type this right now. She smiled and in her very thick accent, said very simply, "I celebrate EVERYTHING!" What?? I chuckled and questioned her enthusiastic response. She went on to explain that she lived in a very diverse neighborhood with people from all over the word. The people in this neighborhood literally celebrate everything! She said to me, "ALL of the celebrations and festivals are beautiful, and I have learned so much about the different people in the world! We have cuisine from every place on earth and we celebrate our differences."
Now hold on...people from all different religions, different cultures, different places embrace each other and celebrate with each other? In a tiny corner of the world here in the good 'ol USA, people are accepting and celebrating each other! I've always said that just because I may not agree with what someone believes, there's no reason that I can't love them just the same.
We are so quick to judge others and it breaks my heart. The vicious judgement runs rampant - from one political party to the other, religion vs. religion, lifestyle vs. lifestyle, parents vs. parents...I think you can see where I'm going here. I've thought a lot about what is going on in the world recently. I'm ashamed of the human race as a result. Here we have this beautiful planet to live on and we kill each other, hate each other, criticize each other, abuse the animals here, and take whatever we please without giving back.
I hate to be cliche, but can't we all just get along? What do you suppose would happen if we started loving each other? If we saw people in need, no matter how small the need, and actually helped? Can you imagine the power we would have if we lifted each other up and supported one another instead of tearing each other down? We all make mistakes...whether we choose to admit it or not. Could it be possible to forgive and forget and simply move on?
Choosing love instead of hate is a pretty simple thing. You absolutely do not have to agree with someone to love them. I challenge you to do one thing nice for someone in the coming days. Give someone a hug when they need it. Write (yes, with pen and paper) someone a quick note to let them know that they're doing a great job - at anything! Compliment someone and actually mean it. Pay for the guy behind you in line at the coffee shop. Give someone a grocery store bouquet of flowers. Get the idea? Kindness doesn't cost a thing - let's spread it everywhere!
I wish you love in your thoughts, love in your words, and love in your heart!
Always,
Sunny XOXO
Thursday, June 16, 2016
Monday, November 16, 2015
That fleeting moment
There's this tiny moment every fall that you'll miss if you aren't paying very close attention. The leaves put on their very best colors for their final curtain call of the season, then they throw themselves recklessly to the ground. That's when my very favorite moment occurs. That very second when the leaves on the ground mirror the exact color of the ones that are still clinging to the trees. It looks like the most fabulously planned confetti throw that has ever happened. I swear it only lasts for about 15 minutes. And by now, where I live anyway, that moment has passed. The leaves on the ground are all brown and crunchy. Some have been swept into piles awaiting the truck that drives around and sucks them all up. And the beautiful show that covers the last of the summery green grass has gone.
With all of the craziness that is happening around us, I wonder how many people slow down long enough to appreciate the shows that are put on for us every day. Have you noticed that there are still beautiful things happening around us? A cold, wet dog nose nudging you so that you'll love on their furry ears. Some stranger with a cart full of groceries letting you check out first with your carton of milk and tub of hummus. A teacher that holds a student while they cry over a heartbreak in their life. The crazy little purple flower that has decided to bloom as it seems to have no idea that the temperature is dropping. People that pray, send positive energy or healing vibes to those that are hurting because they don't know what else to do.
With the recent terrorist attacks in France, I've noticed a lot of people that are "Praying for Paris" and "Praying for Peace." Equally, I have noticed an equal number of people that are furious because these people "aren't praying for the right thing" and "seem to be forgetting what happened in (insert location here)." To the ones that are criticizing...have you ever stopped to think that maybe the person praying or sending energy is frightened and doesn't know what else to do? Do you realize that not everyone can just pick up a weapon and charge head first after a terrorist? And you there - behind your keyboard - what is it that YOU are doing besides criticizing someone that only means to spread good and desperately wants to stop the hatred?
I know - I'm behind a keyboard as well. But I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I am going to continue to scratch my dog's furry ears. She has no idea what is going on in the world, and she needs my love daily just as I need hers. I am going to continue to show love to people around me. Sometimes that means planning ahead so that the man doesn't have to come home and cook himself dinner after he's worked all day. It also means taking the time to bake a batch of cookies for my adult students who have struggles of their own to deal with. I will hug my co-workers because hugs keep us sane some days. I will be present and engaged even as I go about my daily life. It's amazing what you can learn just by smiling at and talking to people at a grocery store! The list could go on forever...but I have work to do.
We don't know when our time is going to be up. While we're here, why not show love and grace? When we show hatred and spew venom, evil wins. I refuse to let evil win. I refuse to let those fleeting moments pass me by without me noticing them. I want to soak in every single good moment this life has to offer so that when my ticket is up I can fully believe that I lived a good life and I have a million good memories. Every laugh, every crinkled nose, every hug, every waggy dog tail, every kitty purr, every shared meal, every helping hand, every show that nature puts on for us...those are the good things. Did you notice that none of those are things you can buy in a store? Can't we all agree to let love win? What was it I heard about "divided we fall?" If we, the ones who want peace, unite against the few who want evil just imagine what we might be able to accomplish! Don't let those fleeting moments pass you by! If you pray, continue to pray. If you send positive energy or healing vibes, continue with these practices. Just keep exuding love!
"If it's not love, stop doing it. Don't change for anybody." Horst Rechelbacher
My best to you always,
Sunny
With all of the craziness that is happening around us, I wonder how many people slow down long enough to appreciate the shows that are put on for us every day. Have you noticed that there are still beautiful things happening around us? A cold, wet dog nose nudging you so that you'll love on their furry ears. Some stranger with a cart full of groceries letting you check out first with your carton of milk and tub of hummus. A teacher that holds a student while they cry over a heartbreak in their life. The crazy little purple flower that has decided to bloom as it seems to have no idea that the temperature is dropping. People that pray, send positive energy or healing vibes to those that are hurting because they don't know what else to do.
With the recent terrorist attacks in France, I've noticed a lot of people that are "Praying for Paris" and "Praying for Peace." Equally, I have noticed an equal number of people that are furious because these people "aren't praying for the right thing" and "seem to be forgetting what happened in (insert location here)." To the ones that are criticizing...have you ever stopped to think that maybe the person praying or sending energy is frightened and doesn't know what else to do? Do you realize that not everyone can just pick up a weapon and charge head first after a terrorist? And you there - behind your keyboard - what is it that YOU are doing besides criticizing someone that only means to spread good and desperately wants to stop the hatred?
I know - I'm behind a keyboard as well. But I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I am going to continue to scratch my dog's furry ears. She has no idea what is going on in the world, and she needs my love daily just as I need hers. I am going to continue to show love to people around me. Sometimes that means planning ahead so that the man doesn't have to come home and cook himself dinner after he's worked all day. It also means taking the time to bake a batch of cookies for my adult students who have struggles of their own to deal with. I will hug my co-workers because hugs keep us sane some days. I will be present and engaged even as I go about my daily life. It's amazing what you can learn just by smiling at and talking to people at a grocery store! The list could go on forever...but I have work to do.
We don't know when our time is going to be up. While we're here, why not show love and grace? When we show hatred and spew venom, evil wins. I refuse to let evil win. I refuse to let those fleeting moments pass me by without me noticing them. I want to soak in every single good moment this life has to offer so that when my ticket is up I can fully believe that I lived a good life and I have a million good memories. Every laugh, every crinkled nose, every hug, every waggy dog tail, every kitty purr, every shared meal, every helping hand, every show that nature puts on for us...those are the good things. Did you notice that none of those are things you can buy in a store? Can't we all agree to let love win? What was it I heard about "divided we fall?" If we, the ones who want peace, unite against the few who want evil just imagine what we might be able to accomplish! Don't let those fleeting moments pass you by! If you pray, continue to pray. If you send positive energy or healing vibes, continue with these practices. Just keep exuding love!
"If it's not love, stop doing it. Don't change for anybody." Horst Rechelbacher
My best to you always,
Sunny
Monday, February 28, 2011
Things I've Learned
This past week has been a whirlwind of activity. And it’s brought some things to my attention. Number one, it’s amazing what you’ll do when you finally find what you’ve been searching for in this world. You’ll leave things you thought you loved, and you’ll travel great lengths. When you choose to do things like these, people in your life tend to have very strong reactions. You do know that what you do with your life is everyone else’s business…don’t you? Now, let’s not get this confused. I want to be very clear. I don’t for one minute mind genuine concern. I actually appreciate it. It’s nothing that I wouldn’t express if someone I held dear to me decided to do something drastic in their life. Further, I don’t mind support and/or encouragement. I truly appreciate that more than I can put into words. What I have a hard time processing, however, is when people judge what they don’t understand. When they choose to hurl nasty words about people that they’ve literally spent less than an hour with ever – I’m genuinely baffled.
Now, I have to give some examples of what I’ve learned in the past year of my life. I realize that to some people, I’m still young and stupid. I have an old soul, and I’m quite a thinker, so listen up. Someone told me something that I found to be very true not too awfully long ago. “There’s no such thing as a Kleenex that’s too soggy to hold when it’s for a good enough friend.” Now, I’m paraphrasing a bit because I’ve slept since that was said to me. But the point is this – when you love someone enough, you’ll do anything for them. This includes holding their soggy Kleenex and handing them freshly folded ones as needed. Some things, we couldn’t bear to face without friends like that in our lives. Then there’s the friend that you see every now and again, but they’re always there for you when your life goes to crap. I never, ever discount this sort of friend. And just because we’re not together constantly doesn’t mean that I love them any less. Then there’s the friend that knows how to break through your hard candy coating and get to the gooey marshmallow middle. This friend will do things like hold your hand and read you a Dr. Suess book when they find out that you’re moving. And hug you hard when your day has gone to hell, or when your heart gets broken – again. I do have one friend that has been my friend since I was 13 years old. Through the years, we’ve shared a lot. Gains, losses, secrets, hysterical laughter…and when I do something that most people would consider nutso, this friend simply wishes me happiness and tells me that if things go south and I end up shattered, people will disappear this time. Then there’s the boss that you honestly love with all of your heart that listens to you and actually cares what happens in your life outside of work. And don’t forget the coworkers that become your surrogate family. Oh - and the one that you spend a healthy 30 hours a week with that is your counselor, friend, gentle critic, sounding board, and voice of reason.
I’m of the extremely firm persuasion that everything that happens in our lives happens for a reason. We may not know what the reason is immediately. For that matter, we may never know the reason. Some things aren’t ours to know. I also believe that every single person – good or bad – that comes through our lives comes through for a reason. I have the most amazingly fantastic luck. I’m blessed. I’m fortunate. However you choose to say it, I have met the most incredible assortment of people in my short 33 years on this planet. Every single person I’ve encountered in my life has taught me a lesson. I’ve learned that you can be friends with someone for years and trust them with your life, and they might turn around and totally demolish your life without warning. When that happens, you’ll find the strength to pick yourself up and start over. It’s not easy to do, but the rewards are countless! I learned how to take care of myself for the first time in my life. And I learned that there are lots of serious assholes in this world. Then came the revelation that – are you ready for this?? – you actually have to trust people! I know. It’s hard to fathom. Trust is hard to re-learn when yours has been betrayed. And wow – when you do realize that you can actually trust some folks here and there, it’s beyond liberating! I also learned that even though you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that someone loves you, sometimes they will completely break your heart with awful, hateful words. You still love them in spite of this, but it doesn’t make the pain any less real. When this occurs, it tends to make me clam up. I stop sharing because my words get twisted and used as ammunition against me. The lesson here is that we need to be careful who we drop our guard with. Support doesn’t always come from those that you need it from the most.
I said all of that to say this –
Thank you to all of the wonderful people that are in my life, and those that have passed through. I have learned something from each and every one of you. Thank you for being harsh, kind, hateful, loving, and supportive. I even appreciate the breaks in my heart that have occurred along the way. Thank you for being my friends, showing me love and reminding me that I can do whatever I set my mind to. I love you for being in my life – regardless of the capacity. I am stronger, braver, kinder, and a generally better person because of you.
All of my love,
Sunny
Monday, December 13, 2010
Huh?
Yesterday, I walked a woman out onto the porch of the store and I noticed the Bradford Pear tree that resides beside Arthur. (Arthur is a giant, iron camel that sits in front of the store.) Almost all of its leaves are gone, save a few little red ones that are scarcely hanging on at all anymore. In the spring, this tree is covered in tiny, white blossoms. It looks like something out of a fairytale with all of its tiny green buds popping out from their winter covers. Then, as the summer rolls in, the white petals of those precious little flowers flutter in the breeze like some crazy breed of snowflake. All through the summer, that tree is about the greenest thing on the creek. Even when everything else is brown and the grass sounds like you're walking on Fritos, that tree is still showing off. When the weather starts cooling off in the fall, its leaves turn the most brilliant shade of orangey red. I've had a bit of a love affair with this tree over the past couple of years. It seems to remind me that there's always a bit of beauty around the corner despite the chaos that might be swirling around me.
This year, I missed the beautiful show that the tree displays when the air starts to chill. I'm not sure that I know where I was when she began to blush. I don't know what was so important in my world that persuaded me to ignore my leafy friend. Now, her branches are almost bare. While I appreciate the beauty of her naked branches, I despise the fact that I missed the opportunity to watch her display her amazing, fiery red show. It made me a bit melancholy when I came to this realization.
Unfortunately, this isn't the first time I've been so busy with my oh so important life that I've missed something. What gives me the right to have such tunnel vision? Absolutely nothing. I have the right to seek out a content existence and be happy in this life, but I do not have the right to disregard everyone and everything else on the entire planet while doing so.
Now, Christmas is right around the corner. I spent last night wrapping a few gifts and enjoying a couple of glasses of good wine. I've not been a huge fan of Christmas in the commercial sense for the majority of my adult life. I get what it's supposed to be all about, and I fully appreciate that. What I'm not a huge fan of is all of the buying and wanting and scurrying about in order to live up to some ridiculous standard that heaven only knows can't ever be met. My daddy always said that he didn't care about the gifts and all of the bustle, as long as we were all together. All he ever wanted was for everyone in our family to sit down to a nice dinner together and enjoy each other. I'll never get to have dinner with my daddy again, and I'll miss that for the rest of my life. I won't have Christmas with my family this year, just as I didn't have Thanksgiving with them. I saw them mid November, sure. But it just wasn't the same. And this year, I'll have Christmas dinner with my adopted Bandera family again. My adopted family has helped me keep my sanity over the past couple of years. And Kim is the best cheerleader I could ask for. No matter how ridiculous my life gets, she always has mimosas and a good laugh ready to go for me.
I guess what I'm saying is that the people and things that we love most in this life can and will disappear without warning. I'm starting my New Year's resolution list early this year. Well, I guess I don't have a list to speak of really, maybe just the one thing. Beginning now, I'm putting my very important life on the back burner. The things that have been brushed aside are my top priority. I will not let another day pass without noticing what my favorite tree is up to. Further, I will love the people that I am so blessed to have in my life with everything that I've got. I hope that all of you will do the same, and maybe realize that none of us take enough time to stop and smell the roses - to be quite cliche. Take the time, show the "I love you's" instead of just saying them, and love with reckless abandon. I wish each and every one of you a very merry Christmas, and a heart filled with wonder like that of a child. All of my love!
Sunny
This year, I missed the beautiful show that the tree displays when the air starts to chill. I'm not sure that I know where I was when she began to blush. I don't know what was so important in my world that persuaded me to ignore my leafy friend. Now, her branches are almost bare. While I appreciate the beauty of her naked branches, I despise the fact that I missed the opportunity to watch her display her amazing, fiery red show. It made me a bit melancholy when I came to this realization.
Unfortunately, this isn't the first time I've been so busy with my oh so important life that I've missed something. What gives me the right to have such tunnel vision? Absolutely nothing. I have the right to seek out a content existence and be happy in this life, but I do not have the right to disregard everyone and everything else on the entire planet while doing so.
Now, Christmas is right around the corner. I spent last night wrapping a few gifts and enjoying a couple of glasses of good wine. I've not been a huge fan of Christmas in the commercial sense for the majority of my adult life. I get what it's supposed to be all about, and I fully appreciate that. What I'm not a huge fan of is all of the buying and wanting and scurrying about in order to live up to some ridiculous standard that heaven only knows can't ever be met. My daddy always said that he didn't care about the gifts and all of the bustle, as long as we were all together. All he ever wanted was for everyone in our family to sit down to a nice dinner together and enjoy each other. I'll never get to have dinner with my daddy again, and I'll miss that for the rest of my life. I won't have Christmas with my family this year, just as I didn't have Thanksgiving with them. I saw them mid November, sure. But it just wasn't the same. And this year, I'll have Christmas dinner with my adopted Bandera family again. My adopted family has helped me keep my sanity over the past couple of years. And Kim is the best cheerleader I could ask for. No matter how ridiculous my life gets, she always has mimosas and a good laugh ready to go for me.
I guess what I'm saying is that the people and things that we love most in this life can and will disappear without warning. I'm starting my New Year's resolution list early this year. Well, I guess I don't have a list to speak of really, maybe just the one thing. Beginning now, I'm putting my very important life on the back burner. The things that have been brushed aside are my top priority. I will not let another day pass without noticing what my favorite tree is up to. Further, I will love the people that I am so blessed to have in my life with everything that I've got. I hope that all of you will do the same, and maybe realize that none of us take enough time to stop and smell the roses - to be quite cliche. Take the time, show the "I love you's" instead of just saying them, and love with reckless abandon. I wish each and every one of you a very merry Christmas, and a heart filled with wonder like that of a child. All of my love!
Sunny
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Bright light! Bright light!
Once upon a time, there was a girl that moved into a cute little apartment over a bed and breakfast. She very much loved living in her upstairs palace. There were lots of windows, and a bar whose music drifted in through her open windows in the evenings. One of her favorite things about her tiny castle was laying in her bed at night and looking at the courthouse. She also relished the nights where she could silently spy on the drunks parading down the street and the alley after the bar had closed. It was most amusing. Due to the fact that she did live upstairs, she was somewhat hidden from the things that one would normally deal with living at street level. She thought nothing of sleeping with the windows flung wide open, and it rarely crossed her mind to be decent whilst walking from the shower to the bedroom.
One day, she was off work and decided that a nap would be quite nice. Unfortunately, some noisy creatures disturbed her normally peaceful nap time. She peered out the window to see men in hard hats commandeering a bucket truck. This could only mean trouble. They drilled and hammered and yelled back and forth to each other. She gave up on her nap, and proceeded to deal with sorting laundry. It wasn't until after her evening walk with her rotten dog that she realized what the men had done. As she rounded the corner to head home, she saw it. The sun had almost completely set...except for in front of her place. It was so bright that her pale skin was almost seared by the light! What had they done?? Her cover of darkness was gone! How was she supposed to lie undetected in her bed and people watch on busy weekends? Her adorable lamps on the bedside tables would likely never have a use again! She grumbled as she plodded up the stairs with the fur ball. How dare them! I mean, sure - it was safer for people walking down the street and all. But what about her??? She went to bed early that night, and the light flooded through the blinds and lit up her bedroom like Clark Griswold's house at Christmas time. She tried turning the blinds in the opposite direction in hopes of blocking out at least a bit of the light. No luck. She tried to be positive. At least if someone broke in she'd be able to see their face enough to give an extremely detailed account of their features to the police. Her aim would likely be better due to higher visibility when she shot the jerks for breaking in in the first place. But oh the light!! She resolved to use her new fancy drill to hang curtains when she got in from work the following afternoon. Perhaps the very bright light will persuade the noisier of the drunks to not linger . I mean, the light did bother her sober eyes so she could only imagine seeing that spotlight through beer goggles!
Maybe her fancy drill and sage green curtains will thwart the evil men's efforts to flood the entire world with light. Men with hard hats in bucket trucks rarely mean good news. Thank you, Bandera Electric Coop, for shedding a little light...ok a RIDICULOUS amount of light on the world!
Quite illuminated,
Sunny (and I don't want cracks about my name and the light, people!!)
One day, she was off work and decided that a nap would be quite nice. Unfortunately, some noisy creatures disturbed her normally peaceful nap time. She peered out the window to see men in hard hats commandeering a bucket truck. This could only mean trouble. They drilled and hammered and yelled back and forth to each other. She gave up on her nap, and proceeded to deal with sorting laundry. It wasn't until after her evening walk with her rotten dog that she realized what the men had done. As she rounded the corner to head home, she saw it. The sun had almost completely set...except for in front of her place. It was so bright that her pale skin was almost seared by the light! What had they done?? Her cover of darkness was gone! How was she supposed to lie undetected in her bed and people watch on busy weekends? Her adorable lamps on the bedside tables would likely never have a use again! She grumbled as she plodded up the stairs with the fur ball. How dare them! I mean, sure - it was safer for people walking down the street and all. But what about her??? She went to bed early that night, and the light flooded through the blinds and lit up her bedroom like Clark Griswold's house at Christmas time. She tried turning the blinds in the opposite direction in hopes of blocking out at least a bit of the light. No luck. She tried to be positive. At least if someone broke in she'd be able to see their face enough to give an extremely detailed account of their features to the police. Her aim would likely be better due to higher visibility when she shot the jerks for breaking in in the first place. But oh the light!! She resolved to use her new fancy drill to hang curtains when she got in from work the following afternoon. Perhaps the very bright light will persuade the noisier of the drunks to not linger . I mean, the light did bother her sober eyes so she could only imagine seeing that spotlight through beer goggles!
Maybe her fancy drill and sage green curtains will thwart the evil men's efforts to flood the entire world with light. Men with hard hats in bucket trucks rarely mean good news. Thank you, Bandera Electric Coop, for shedding a little light...ok a RIDICULOUS amount of light on the world!
Quite illuminated,
Sunny (and I don't want cracks about my name and the light, people!!)
Monday, September 20, 2010
Shut up!
Pulp Fiction is one of my very favorite movies of all time. As a matter of fact, I might pop it in while I'm cleaning this afternoon. For those of you with a delicate disposition that are easily offended, shield your precious little virgin eyes as I'm about to quote some filthy language. (I now find myself wondering why you're reading my stuff in the first place if you're easily offended...anyways...)
Mia: Don't you hate that?
Vincent: What?
Mia: Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?
Vincent: I don't know. That's a good question.
Mia: That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.
Mia makes a very valid point here. Vincent is obviously horribly tortured by having to take the lovely Mia Wallace out to dinner. I mean, she is the boss's wife after all. Ever notice how chatty you get when you're nervous? There are you weirdos out there that get all quiet when you're nervous, and that makes people like me nervous. It's a vicious cycle. Even Depeche Mode told us to "Enjoy the silence" in 1990. And again in 2004. Could there be something to all of this quiet?? And we've all heard "You have one mouth and two ears for a very good reason!" That's poetic speak for "SHUT UP and listen!!" Being the sort that observes and calculates, I can vouch for this quiet nonsense. The girls I work with swear I have dog ears - I hear everything that happens in that store. It's not that I have super human hearing, mind you. It's that I'm much busier hearing than talking. I've even learned to hear multiple conversations at one time - and fully retain knowledge of all of them.
Being quiet and hearing everything is almost like a super power. I always did think Wonder Woman was pretty bad ass...but that could be my affection for really big hair showing through. I can't deflect bullets with big bracelets. I love all things shiny, but they bring me little power. Forgive me, I digress. Sharing a comfortable silence with someone is a truly golden experience. Have you ever accomplished this? Turn of the TV, the iPod, the cell phones, and - if you're still of that persuasion - the land line phone. Share the room with someone. Can you make it five whole minutes without blathering on about some insignificant nonsense? I know there is someone that will argue that I talk an awful lot. And sometimes I do! I mean, you should be inside my head for a day! It's a damned busy place in there! I have lots to get out so my cranium stays intact. And I don't go completely bat shit nuts. I'm not saying you should sit and gaze into each others' eyes and not speak. That's not comfortable for anyone. Just share a room. Be quiet. If all else fails, you can always take Mary Chapin Carpenter's advice and "Shut Up and Kiss Me!"
Long story short, it's amazing what you can learn when you just relax and observe. Once words escape your mouth, it's some sort of hell getting them back to where they came from. They always leave a mess much akin to a red wine stain on a white counter top. I'm pretty sure that happiness is a very quiet thing. It's not a grand parade, bustling through the streets drawing attention to itself. When you're quiet, you learn that someone likes chicken Masala, not chicken Marsala. One letter could ruin a dinner! If you're listening instead of hearing, you learn that there are days that make a heart sink by merely showing up on the calendar. Sometimes listening helps you remember when somebody needs and extra hug or a few more minutes of quiet snuggling. There are a thousand reasons to listen, and about a hundred reasons to speak. If you're at a loss for words in an uncomfortable situation, good! You don't have to say a word. Just be there if you're needed. Words tend to muck up already awkward situations.
All of this preaching about silence and quiet and listening and look at me rambling on! I have laundry to do and Sissy fur to vacuum off the carpet - again! AND I have meatballs to make for tonight's dinner! Busy mind, busy hands I suppose. Go give someone an unexpected hug. It may be the saving grace of the hug-ee's day! You never know what someone is going through. I hope you all have a wonderful, quiet day.
Shhhhh!!
Sunny
Mia: Don't you hate that?
Vincent: What?
Mia: Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?
Vincent: I don't know. That's a good question.
Mia: That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.
Mia makes a very valid point here. Vincent is obviously horribly tortured by having to take the lovely Mia Wallace out to dinner. I mean, she is the boss's wife after all. Ever notice how chatty you get when you're nervous? There are you weirdos out there that get all quiet when you're nervous, and that makes people like me nervous. It's a vicious cycle. Even Depeche Mode told us to "Enjoy the silence" in 1990. And again in 2004. Could there be something to all of this quiet?? And we've all heard "You have one mouth and two ears for a very good reason!" That's poetic speak for "SHUT UP and listen!!" Being the sort that observes and calculates, I can vouch for this quiet nonsense. The girls I work with swear I have dog ears - I hear everything that happens in that store. It's not that I have super human hearing, mind you. It's that I'm much busier hearing than talking. I've even learned to hear multiple conversations at one time - and fully retain knowledge of all of them.
Being quiet and hearing everything is almost like a super power. I always did think Wonder Woman was pretty bad ass...but that could be my affection for really big hair showing through. I can't deflect bullets with big bracelets. I love all things shiny, but they bring me little power. Forgive me, I digress. Sharing a comfortable silence with someone is a truly golden experience. Have you ever accomplished this? Turn of the TV, the iPod, the cell phones, and - if you're still of that persuasion - the land line phone. Share the room with someone. Can you make it five whole minutes without blathering on about some insignificant nonsense? I know there is someone that will argue that I talk an awful lot. And sometimes I do! I mean, you should be inside my head for a day! It's a damned busy place in there! I have lots to get out so my cranium stays intact. And I don't go completely bat shit nuts. I'm not saying you should sit and gaze into each others' eyes and not speak. That's not comfortable for anyone. Just share a room. Be quiet. If all else fails, you can always take Mary Chapin Carpenter's advice and "Shut Up and Kiss Me!"
Long story short, it's amazing what you can learn when you just relax and observe. Once words escape your mouth, it's some sort of hell getting them back to where they came from. They always leave a mess much akin to a red wine stain on a white counter top. I'm pretty sure that happiness is a very quiet thing. It's not a grand parade, bustling through the streets drawing attention to itself. When you're quiet, you learn that someone likes chicken Masala, not chicken Marsala. One letter could ruin a dinner! If you're listening instead of hearing, you learn that there are days that make a heart sink by merely showing up on the calendar. Sometimes listening helps you remember when somebody needs and extra hug or a few more minutes of quiet snuggling. There are a thousand reasons to listen, and about a hundred reasons to speak. If you're at a loss for words in an uncomfortable situation, good! You don't have to say a word. Just be there if you're needed. Words tend to muck up already awkward situations.
All of this preaching about silence and quiet and listening and look at me rambling on! I have laundry to do and Sissy fur to vacuum off the carpet - again! AND I have meatballs to make for tonight's dinner! Busy mind, busy hands I suppose. Go give someone an unexpected hug. It may be the saving grace of the hug-ee's day! You never know what someone is going through. I hope you all have a wonderful, quiet day.
Shhhhh!!
Sunny
Friday, September 17, 2010
When Things Become "Uncool"
Tonight when I got in from work, I ate a bite of dinner and settled in for some quiet time. Due to the fact that someone very dear to me is in some pretty bad pain, I threw on some capris and a t-shirt to tromp out into the rain to retrieve some super strength Tylenol to complete the Advil & Tylenol cocktail needed to make the poor man stop wincing in pain. I automatically grabbed for the first shirt I could find. This shirt just happened to be my Luckenbach t-shirt. I got this shirt on a trip down to Luckenbach once upon a time. For those of you who don't know the significance of this place that I'm talking about, Google it. For those of you who know the sanctity of said place, you understand why a memento from such a place would be pretty cool to own. Well, if you live in East Texas like I did, it was cool. Now that I live about 45 minutes from it, it somehow loses some of the coolness. When in the hell did that happen anyway? I still fully appreciate the significance of the hallowed little town on the creek that Hondo Crouch so lovingly brought to life. I understand that Willie's infamous 4th of July picnic pretty much became famous because of this little patch of earth. And those of us who were lucky enough to have encountered Marge when she was still among us understand that her snippy attitude wasn't her being hateful, it was really more of a form of tough love. And if you've ever had to use the restroom there, you've likely fought off a tribe of dirt daubers and managed to hold the curtain to maintain a shred of decency. Why is it that being in close proximity to something makes it less cool to sport your mementos from said place? It's funny that when I lived in Tyler, an Austin's t-shirt was just plain bad ass. Down here, it's much cooler to have a Racket and Jog t-shirt. Could it be a form of a bragging right that you've been somewhere out of your territory that's cool? Is the place any less awesome because you're closer to it? Are there other things that lose that magic over the years?
Well, I proudly sported my beloved green Luckenbach t-shirt to the Super S tonight. Maybe I'm a geek. Or maybe I've just stopped giving a rat's ass what people think about me. Flying by the seat of my pants seems to be going swimmingly for me thus far. And for the first time in a very long time, I'm saying "Me first!" I'm here to tell you - it's pretty freeing to stop caring what society thinks about you and start caring what you think about you. In case you haven't taken notice lately, society is seriously jacked up! To quote one of my very favorite websites of all time (www.hotghettomess.com) "If you're not appalled, you're not paying attention!" I, personally, am appalled! People. Are. Nuts. End of discussion. So, wear your mementos, sticker your cars with goofy stickers, and play your happy music every time you get the chance. We're only here once, folks. No dress rehearsals, no take backs. Carpe diem!! The very wise man Theodor Seuss Geisel - aka Dr. Seuss - once said "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Let that one roll around in your cranium a bit. I don't know if there have ever been any truer words written. Be kind to each other, and live for today.
Still hanging out in my very cool Luckenback t-shirt,
Sunny
Well, I proudly sported my beloved green Luckenbach t-shirt to the Super S tonight. Maybe I'm a geek. Or maybe I've just stopped giving a rat's ass what people think about me. Flying by the seat of my pants seems to be going swimmingly for me thus far. And for the first time in a very long time, I'm saying "Me first!" I'm here to tell you - it's pretty freeing to stop caring what society thinks about you and start caring what you think about you. In case you haven't taken notice lately, society is seriously jacked up! To quote one of my very favorite websites of all time (www.hotghettomess.com) "If you're not appalled, you're not paying attention!" I, personally, am appalled! People. Are. Nuts. End of discussion. So, wear your mementos, sticker your cars with goofy stickers, and play your happy music every time you get the chance. We're only here once, folks. No dress rehearsals, no take backs. Carpe diem!! The very wise man Theodor Seuss Geisel - aka Dr. Seuss - once said "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Let that one roll around in your cranium a bit. I don't know if there have ever been any truer words written. Be kind to each other, and live for today.
Still hanging out in my very cool Luckenback t-shirt,
Sunny
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